Busting the Matrimonial Myth: Grooms Don’t Want To Be Involved in Wedding Planning

Weddings are what we do best. Here at Schupepe, we take great pride in helping brides and grooms-to-be make their dream wedding day a reality. We have had the great pleasure of being involved in a wide variety of weddings – in backyards, isolated beaches, on top of one of New Zealand’s iconic cliff-tops – you name it and our tents have covered it.

Our experiences in the New Zealand wedding arena have brought to light certain myths that we would like to bust. There are millions of blogs clogging up the internet on how to get the groom involved in wedding planning. We decided that it was time to give our kiwi couples the respect they deserve. Let us explain…

Welcome to the 21st century where men and women are slowly becoming equal partners – sharing domestic chores, financial obligations, and parental responsibilities. People are getting married later in life and allowing more time for study, meeting career goals, and taking overseas adventures. Given the fact that the average wedding can cost approximately $30,000 (of course, it can be done for less) and that more couples are financing their own weddings, many will extend their engagement until they are more financially secure.

D312T6 Woman florist cutting flowers shop bouquet man customer choosing


In the past, if a man produced a ring, showed up on time and in a relatively unwrinkled tux, he was praised by friends and family. Those days are long gone. Grooms are slowly but surely becoming more involved in the wedding planning – from choosing the venue to picking out flower arrangements and even deciding the colour of linens. Most busy and modern brides-to-be are thrilled at this turn of events.

Anyone who has ever planned a wedding will know how time-consuming and stressful the whole process can be. The majority of engaged women work full-time and have the same time constraints as their fiancés. It only makes sense that they work as a team to organise their special day. Working as a team and developing effective communication skills are the key ingredients to any happy marriage. When both partners have equal responsibilities in organising the wedding, it is generally a good omen for things to come.

wedding planning pic

Here at Schupepe, we have had the pleasure of working with a wide variety of happy couples where the groom-to-be takes the lead in orchestrating the venue arrangements, as well as the entertainment, catering, and much more! In fact, for many twosomes, it actually comes down to who has the most flexibility in his or her schedule to devote to the countless phone calls, appointments, and decisions needed to arrange a marriage ceremony.

We thought it would be nice to highlight their experiences in a series of blog posts entitled, Did Anyone Bother to Ask the Groom? You will find so many blog posts entitled, How to Get Your Groom Involved in Planning the Wedding. Let’s put an end to those clichés exploited in countless romantic comedies – implying that men are only interested in rugby and beer and stuff and cannot be asked to participate in the planning.

Many of our grooms have graciously allowed us to interview them. Stay tuned as we explore the modern groom’s perspective!